BREAKING THE SILENCE

Dr. Richard J. Henderson June 13, 2004

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Luke 7:36-8:3
Psalm 32

Introduction

At noon, two men walk out of their office building, heading for lunch. As they turn the corner of their building, they see a man with wide eyes in crumpled clothes who immediately points at them and says to each one, "Guilty!" "Guilty!"

They are a little taken back, but as they walk, one man says to the other, "I wonder how he knew!"

Maybe he knew because we are all guilty - no one is perfect, everyone fails sometime. The wild man could have pointed at anyone and he would have been right. Isn't it part of the human condition to make mistakes?

Maybe he knew they were guilty because they showed it in some subtle way - the curve and slope of the shoulders, a tension in the jaw or a look of defensiveness. Guilt can sometimes be seen as it is felt. It takes its toll on us emotionally, sometimes physically, certainly spiritually.

I

Every one of us makes mistakes; we all fail. In more blunt religious terms, we are all sinners. As the Bible says, "we have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." We know it.

Some of us can remember all too well the people we've hurt, the words we wish we could take back, the dumb or nasty things we did.

Sometimes we don't think about the morality of our acts before we do them. Some who have been caught in the latest round of business scandals, when interviewed said, "Yes, I realized it was wrong afterward, but I never gave it much thought at the time. Looking back on it, of course it was wrong."

Then again, sometimes an action is wrong, we know it's wrong, and we go ahead and do it anyway.

The apostle Paul wrote: "I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate." We are all caught in the mire of sin.

II

The wrong that we do takes a toll on us. We seem to end up paying for our sin one way or another. The guilt from what we've done eats away at our spirits. Many people pay emotionally because they realize how their actions have hurt other people. Some people have trouble getting to sleep at night because they are haunted by guilt. Guilt even affects our bodies - physical changes happen to us.

A person is wired for a lie detector test. The test is measuring the body's response to telling a lie. Our bodies react physically when we lie. The lie detector is a guilt detector.

This is only one way in which our bodies respond to guilt. Many people react by not being able to eat, or waking up over and over again in the night. The author of this Psalm says, "my body wasted away"... "My strength dried up as in the heat of summer." Author Anne Lamott has explained what happens when we sin by refusing to forgive. She says when we hold on to our anger and refuse to forgive, it's like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die. All sin is a form of rat poison. It eats away at us and can kill us. We only get rid of the poison by flushing it with forgiveness.

III

As long as we silently hold that poison within us, it will continue to kill us. To be free and clean means to break the silence of guilt and open ourselves to God. When we don't try to hide it anymore, and lay out our failure before God, God takes it away.

Like so many things, when we silently keep our mistakes hidden inside, they fester, grow and eat away at us. To break that silence is to clean it all out. It's like breathing fresh air when you've been closed up in a stale, dank, smelly room.

Saint Augustine is said to have had this Psalm printed and hanging above his bed, so that when he woke up he could remind himself that sin kills the spirit and God offers forgiveness.

The savior who went to the cross for us draws out the cancerous effects of guilt and sin. It's a matter of breaking the silence, admitting our mistakes and letting God in.

IV

When we are forgiven, we are free and our lives are clear. Not only is the heavy hand of guilt lifted from us, but we are open to God.

To be in a right relationship with God doesn't mean that we are perfect - it means we are forgiven by God. The cancerous guilt growing in us is cut out and we can live as if it never was there.

As the bumper sticker says, "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven." That's the whole point; it is not as if we somehow try to make ourselves righteous, but that we trust God to forgive us. Because of Christ's love, we can live freely trusting God.

Conclusion

In a community not far from here, a lone man walks the streets of town. He is always alone. Almost everyday he is out ambling along the sidewalks.

When he was a young man, he went to war. After he came back from the war, he never talked about what happened there. He never once mentioned his war experiences.

He didn't look for a job; he lived with his family. His parents took care of him, paid all his bills, and knowing him to be a sensitive person, they never pressed him about what was wrong or why he wasn't looking for work. It was then that he started walking the streets of town, by himself.

He never stops to talk to anyone; he just walks and looks at the familiar world around him.

When his parents died, his brothers and sisters took over for them - they pay the bills and look after him. Everyday he goes out quietly walking in town, all alone. Obviously, something happened during the war that changed his life forever. You can't help but think he experienced something horrendous for which he feels a gnawing guilt. It appears to have stolen his life from him. And now he walks alone and silent everyday.

Whenever I see him, I think, "If only he could break the silence."

Amen.

©Richard J. Henderson 2004